change doesn‘t happen in the way we expect
Sometimes, something changes around us. Sometimes, something changes within us.
And sometimes, it takes a while before we even understand what has changed.
For me, this is what Internalization is about.
After the resistance of Obstruction and the breaking open of Fracture, there comes a point when we begin to look inward. We start to make sense of what has happened, what it means to us, and how it changes the way we see ourselves and the world.
There is no clear moment when this process is complete. Often, it happens quietly, almost without us noticing.
When something begins to shift within us
I think we sometimes expect change to be more obvious than it really is.
We look for a turning point, a decision, or a moment when everything suddenly makes sense. But often, change happens in much smaller ways.
We react differently to something that used to upset us. We begin to question a belief we have held for years. We let go of something we once thought we needed to hold on to.
Nothing around us may look different. And yet, something within us has shifted.
Our experiences don’t simply disappear. They become part of how we understand ourselves.
Sometimes they change what we value, what we notice, or what we are willing to accept.
To me, Internalization is about this process:
allowing what we experience to become part of us, without letting it define everything we are.
we don’t have to return to who we are
I often think about how change works in nature.
A tree doesn’t always grow in a straight line. Sometimes it grows around an obstacle.
Water slowly reshapes stone. A forest can look completely different after a fire, and new life may eventually emerge.
I find something familiar in these processes. They remind me that change doesn’t necessarily mean going back to the way things were.
Perhaps we don’t have to return to an earlier version of ourselves either.
We can take what we have learned with us.
We can see things differently. We can find a new way forward without having to understand every step along the way.
what internalization looks like
When I create the works in this series, I’m not trying to illustrate a particular experience or tell the viewer what they should feel.
I’m interested in inner states that are often difficult to put into words.
The layered textures, organic forms, and colors in Internalization leave room for individual interpretation.
I don’t want to provide all the answers. I want the work to leave space for people to find something of their own in it.
You might see calm, uncertainty, acceptance, or a sense of things slowly falling into place.
Someone else might see something entirely different.
That is part of what interests me about abstract art. We don’t all see the same thing,
even when we look at the same image. What we bring to a work of art shapes what we
find in it.
Sometimes, a painting connects with us because it gives a visual form to something
we have felt but haven’t quite been able to express.
three works, one ongoing process
Internalization is the third work in my series Awareness studies. Together, the three works explore different aspects of how we experience change.
• Obstruction is about the barriers we encounter, including those we create through our own perceptions.
• Fracture explores the tension that arises when something we once relied on begins to break apart.
• Internalization turns inward, towards acceptance, trust, and the process of making room for what has changed.
I don’t see these stages as a fixed path that everyone follows in the same way.
Life is rarely that straightforward. We may move between them, revisit old questions, or discover something new in an experience we thought we had already understood.
For me, the three works are connected by a simple idea: what first feels like an obstacle or an ending can also open up a different way of seeing.
a reminder to return to yourself
I believe art can do more than decorate a room. Sometimes, it can remind us of something we already know but tend to lose
sight of in everyday life.
A painting won’t tell us how to live or make difficult decisions for us. But it can create
a moment of pause. A moment to look, to feel, and perhaps to reconnect with something within ourselves.
This is one of the reasons I create my work.
I want my paintings to leave room for that personal connection. To become a quiet reminder that we don’t always have to look outside ourselves for every answer.
Sometimes, we need a little space to listen to what is already there.
And perhaps that is what Internalization ultimately means to me: not becoming someone entirely new, but slowly finding our way back to ourselves.
Explore the complete journey
Internalization concludes a three-part exploration of perception, transformation, and self-awareness.
Discover how Obstruction, Fracture and Internalization connect as one continues narrative.
→ Explore Evolution